Recently I went into a make up retailer ( I ‘m witholding names to protect the innocent) on the hunt for a new foundation. I wanted a new powder and a new liquid foundation. I show the makeup lady pictures of what my makeup normally looks like, so I can find something that gives me the same look. Barb,yes, we’ll call her Barb, tries 17 million different foundations on me. She tries different colors and different brands and different primers to try to make this stuff work for me. Just when I think I’ve found the one, she makes me walk over to the sunlight. Then she says something that struck me enough to write a blog post about it.

I say, “I think this is it.”

Barb looks at me with her brows furrowed and her lips pursed and says, “No. I’m not going to sell you this.”

I’m sure my confusion was displayed all over my face.

“In those pictures you have a glow. Your skin has these golden undertones and this makeup isn’t doing it justice. It’s too heavy and too dull for you. Whatever you’ve been using, keep using it.”

“Wow,” was all I could say.

This woman had worked hard trying to find the right fit for me. She could have easily let me settle for something to meet her sales quota. Instead, she chose the high road. She chose the road of integrity rather than selling out and making a quick buck. You see, Barb didn’t get all my money that day (I did purchase my usual powder foundation, but not the liquid), which she could have easily done. However, she gained something even better: my trust. Because I know that I can trust her, I value her more, and she’s gained my loyalty. So, I may not have purchased that foundation from her that day, but now I will be going to her for all my future beauty needs. I know she’s not just trying to sell me crap, but that she wants to help me.

We live in a world where everyone is trying to sell something. Let Barb be a reminder that people are the ones who have the money. If you focus on building genuine, integrous, authentic relationships with people, the rest will fall in line. You don’t want one hitter quitters. You want people to feel like they matter to you. The best way to make people feel like they matter to you is to make sure that they actually do matter, and your actions will flow from that.

It’s a simple thing, really, to actually care about people. Somehow, we’ve been taught that people don’t matter and that things do. If we could shift our focus from getting [fill in the blank with whatever we want] to how we can help people, we’d be better off inside and out.

xoxo Kaisha